South Dakota State University announced that its fraternities will be inducting their pledges at Mt. Rushmore.
Size mallogists state their current charts are inaccurate. The higher priced women’s clothing reflects smaller sizes than less expensive clothing of the same dimensions. A woman might be able to wear a size 6 in an expensive brand when it would be a 10 in the cheapest brand. A revised version of the trickedher scale will be published soon.
Joseph Campbell in his book, The Power of Myth, highlights the similarities between religions and the importance of the mores each religion (or lore for tribes) imparts on its tribe or country to allow its members to live in a semblance of harmony. As we watch the greater separation of church and state, we are seeing the adverse results.
Cal Tech said its top student, a volcanologist, will graduate magma cum laudly.
I have great confidence in President Bush’s comments about the need for wiretapping and the expertise of those handling it when the White House can’t keep track of its email.
Energy Conservation Item: To reduce power consumption, physicists have been asked to reduce the speed of light. It is felt that a 50% reduction wouldn’t be noticed by the average consumer. As an energy offset, they will be allowed to increase the speed of dark.
Because of all of the: choose 1 for English; push 2 for espanol, I have removed the “2” button from all of my phones. If your number has a 2 in it, I can no longer call you. You will have to call me (in English). (Side note: I had 2 years of college Spanish and was sent to Germany to spend time along the border facing the Russians making it very useful.)
Singer Sewing Machine announced the introduction of its new, industrial strength, machine, “The Hummer”. It will be used in assembling Kevlar vests.
Anyone who doesn’t believe in cold fusion needs to see the ice thickness in MN in January!
The CIA said that water boarding should be considered “surfing the information highway”.
Since both the predictions of Nostradamus and the Mayan Calendar are saying that the world will end Dec. 22, 2012, I am not going to make any long range plans.
In 1996, there were 1.37 million abortions-more than double the military deaths in all of the U.S. Wars combined. Remember they are “just numbers”.
I am postulating the “180 degree theory” and will ask you to help me in verifying the theory. “Any major announcement on diet, medicine, nutrition, or health will be completely reversed at least annually.” The greater the importance, the more the reversals will occur. A corollary to the theory: sticking with your current regimen will make you right at least 50% of the time.
The Sara Lee packaging roundtable-discussion concluded that storage is better if pies are square.
New research has psychiatrists divided over the causes of divorce.
Some of my humor requires a certain jestation period.
Copyright Feb. 2008 Steve Ganshert
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