Rambler 395

A famous chef had a hobby of building replicas of old sailing ships.  Included in the replicas was a ship that would fire dried peas at other ships using water pressure to propel the peas.

The firing was so accurate that the chef became famous worldwide for his spit pea sloop.

I mailed in my absentee ballot.   I hope absentee wins.

I had a phone call the other day and was asked if Joe was here.  I said you have the wrong number.  She called back within seconds saying this was the last number they had listed for him.   I replied that he still isn’t here and hung up.

Did she think calling a wrong number twice results in the right one?

The psychiatrist said we have multiple personalities.  We asked for group discounts.

Corned beef distributors are holding a convention in Rabbit Hash, Kentucky.

"Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege."-source unknown

I mailed my absentee ballot.   It seems appropriate.   Most of the candidates have been absent from their jobs for the past year.   (Longer if the mental part is included) 

News Headlines (possibly):

Concrete sales have fallen on hard times

Tree trimming company statements have them out on a limb