The Hellman's Mustard Convention will be held in Mayo, FL.
My wife is very supportive of my ramblers. She said they remind her of the Dickens' novel: "Oliver Twisted."
A good example of herd mentality is today's glass frames. They look like the blinders you see on race horses. They eliminate most of your peripheral vision. But many will buy them because they are "in."
I have become an actor in medical movies. I am now a stent man.
Queen Elizabeth II, told the fighting factions of her family to put up their Dukes.
Why do they call them boxing rings when they are square?
Ford said it is redesigning its convertibles from the top down.
To become a proctologist, do you have to have hindsight? (They're redesigning their equipment from the bottom up)
Were religious poets bards of pray?
It's amazing how things have changed. I called a friend the other day and he said he couldn't talk, he had to WII.
Each bill that passes Congress with ear marks reminds me of that martial art-clung poo.
The National CSI Association has published a new standard for a breadth of fresh hair.
Why does the navy weigh anchor each time they leave a port? Does the weight change with age?
I have concluded that recent times are bank holdups in reverse. Robbers used to go into banks to take money. Now banks just go to Congress and hold us up.
The official banking and Wall Street snack-Cheetos.
The two times my wife has called the ambulance service for my breathing problems she ordered from the carryout menu.
My children said I need an executioner for my will.
I regret that I only have 1 life's savings to give for my country.
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